Like Me

There is nothing like a beautiful dress to lift my spirits up. I look beautiful. I feel confident. I can do anything. I can ask a girl out. She will say "yes!"  It is amazing how much a nice dress can do.  It's like magic.  A girl can never have enough beautiful dresses.  I should tell Niel to make more or buy more.  It is important. There is no other way to be beautiful, to feel good about myself.  I need to be adorned with beautiful things. My self-worth is at stake.

Oh, who am I kidding?  I feel as insecure as before. When I ask her out, she will see through my blue dress and see the unloved doll that I am. She will see that this dress was not made for me, but for some other doll. She will see how I'm trying too hard.  It's pathetic to think that a dress can have a great effect on self-worth. I'm pathetic.

Niel saw me sulking in one corner. We looked at each other and both let out a sigh. He immediately walked away, back to his room. I was back to contemplating. Alone. What if I jump from the top of a cabinet, will I break my neck?

My reverie was disrupted when Niel walked back in. No words were spoken. He handed me one of his toys. She looks like a hooker. Who wears such a trashy attire? Despite of what she wore, she looks tough. She looks like a fighter, an adventurer. I didn't notice Niel leave. I started to imagine all the adventures for her, how she'll fly in the sky defending the helpless.

You know what? She looks like me.